I know I haven’t blogged in awhile, shame on me. Even if I didn’t want to discuss weight loss progress I could still let people out there know not to give up on me, right? I’ve been slacking, very badly.
I know there isn’t an excuse for my blog slacking, plus I like blogging, but life has been getting in the way. My job cut my pay tremendously which makes it hard to even get necessities, my dog is going to be put down soon (for her health related problems, not for monetary reasons), and the boyfriend has been giving me lectures about losing too much weight. Ah yes, I haven’t mentioned him yet have I? He’s been a major hurdle to jump over recently. He’s a nice guy and all, but our views on health and weight loss are so completely opposite. He’s one of those “life is short, so eat whatever and be fat and happy” and I’m more like “you eat food to live and fuel your body, not for fun.” I’ve had him since April just in case you’re curious, but he didn’t start out this bad.
I started out 30 pounds heavier when we first met and dated, and now that I’m getting more skinny (he likes big women), he keeps saying I should stop going to the gym and that I should eat more and have more candy and whatnot. He’s even playfully threatened to tie me to the bed and force feed me ice cream. At first I thought him telling me I was too skinny was sweet, but now I’m getting sick of it. I swear and promise I need to drop more weight and that I’m not a size 6 girl wishing to get to a size 2. I would be perfectly happy with a size 12 honestly. The boyfriend is getting to the point where he makes fun of me for what I eat or for my exercise and it’s starting to hurt a little. I’ve told him I don’t like it and it hurts, but then he does the whole “I love you and I’m just looking out for you. I like you just how you are” speech. I’m a bad girlfriend, I admit it. I haven’t said I love you to him yet and I’m not even planning things for the future. I cancel hanging out with him if I haven’t gone to the gym on that day and when we go out to eat and he orders bacon cheddar potato skins and wants to share, I only have 1. When he wants me to sample his dinner of steak smothered in some fatty sauce, I scrape off the sauce and have a small forkful of steak. He has no desire to ever try my fruits or veggies. If something is slightly healthy he curls up his nose at it. I don’t want to call him a problem, but he’s a definite hurdle.
So boyfriend, job insecurity, losing a pet, family health issues, Labor Day celebrating, and possibly no housing have left me with a ton on my plate. Amazing that I haven’t gained or lost anything isn’t it? I’m hoping to change that very soon. I’ve been “cheating” on the boyfriend and doing my gym workouts when he doesn’t know. I say I’m working later at work or I’m taking a brief nap or something along those lines. It’s like I’m cheating Boyfriend with Gym.
I swear and promise to post something next week, fingers crossed it will be something good to report such as getting down to my last goal!
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