So there were a couple days at the beginning of my Intentionally Single month where I wanted to throw in the towel and just revert back to my old ways. I didn’t want to learn or discover anything, I didn’t want to try to figure things out. I had forgotten how to enjoy just being single! Ever since I was about 20, I was involved with something usually. Sometimes it was a boyfriend of some sort, sometimes it was a casual, I was never actually by myself for very long. When I made the pledge, I soon realized that I wasn’t used to being unhinged, it was scary for the first week. My initial instinct was to go on to Craigslist and get someone to fix it. It was like the equivalent of someone quitting an addiction cold turkey, I was having withdrawls. I didn’t go on Craigslist, I made myself calm down and I decided to write a journal of sorts about it.
After week 1, I started to not only get used to but rather enjoy my singleness! I had time to devote to whatever I wish. I was allowed to do whatever I wanted, the freedom was wonderful. I was able to focus on me instead of adding others into the equation. The weeks flew by really, thank goodness I journaled or else I might have missed some things.
Without having a significant other, I accomplished a bunch of things in my month. I got 2 new clients, I lost an extra 15 pounds, I hung out with friends I hadn’t seen in years, I ran in 2 races and got my best times ever, I started doing Pilates 2 times a week, I even got the nerve to clear off my “Gift Shelf”. If I wanted to lounge around in my PJ pants until noon on my off days, I did. I didn’t have to go meet anyone for lunch, dinner, or afternoon fun. I could see shows in the theater without having a guy trying to grab more than just my hand. It was all about me, my plans, my days, my wants and needs.
Everyone should do this once in your life, it feels lovely. You get this sense of self that gives you a major confidence boost. Everyone needs time for themselves and for the longest time I had forgotten that. Doing this showed me that I can be single and successful at the same time, a relationship doesn’t define me like I used to think. DO IT, be single for awhile, you will be glad you did.